She's Always in Relationships, He Uses Them as Excuses Not to Date

It's over! You just broke up. Everyone handles this post-relationship period differently. It's a drastic change. All of a sudden you are alone. You have more time to yourself, and your mind is racing with possible future scenarios. Are you going to enjoy this time off or do you need to jump into another one ASAP? One particular red flag guys have with a new girl is her relationship-jumping past. Her history shows she immediately goes into a new one. He's thinking, how can she move on so quickly? Her strong desire to always have a man in her life is a little scary. Especially when she's implying she's ready to jump back in - NOW! Woah, slow down there. Don’t you need some time to get over the ex? No? Well, that’s kind of weird.

More often than not, she has been in only a few very long relationships, and it’s kind of a scary past. For example, she most likely dated her high school sweetheart all four years. Then they broke up during their freshman year of college after they went to different schools. She then probably dated the first guy she ran into at college orientation. It lasted for three years but ended when he cheated on her. So she found a revenge guy and ended up dating him for the next four years. It more than likely didn’t work out once they moved in together. Maybe she rushed marriage, so they had a messy breakup. So now she's creeping all the new guys she meets. They realize she has been immediately jumping from one relationship into the next, and she gives out the "I need a man" vibe almost instantly. Yikes, extreme cases for sure, but these girls are out there. The "always in a relationship girl."

Take a man-break! So many women feel they are failing in life if a man is not in it. Why the hell are you thinking like this? Honestly, half the time having a man in your life actually makes you fail in life more! Guys preoccupy your time, are lazy, and can potentially drag you down in so many ways. You sacrifice so much to be with them, and the more you need one in your life, the chances are you are settling for crap. Constantly having a guy around cannot be healthy. You need to take breaks from the testosterone. At least a month, but judge for yourself. There needs to be grieving from the last relationship, or maybe some celebrating! You haven’t been out with your girlfriends forever because you just watched movies and stayed in with that deadbeat for months! Now go out and make out with some random boy. WOOO HOOO!

Now how does a guy handle the period between girlfriends? His breakup can truly be rough on him. Of course, but it can also be abused. Does it seem many guys say they are coming off a long and painful relationship? Why are they always saying this? Probably because this is a perfect way to not date you!  Some guys use their ex-factor waaaaay too long. They broke up over two years ago and are still using it to avoid any future relationships.

Sure there are cases where he just broke up like a week ago. He’s still fragile and hurt. He realized having a girlfriend kind of sucked, and he doesn’t want to have one anytime soon. Fair, it happens, and yes, he does need a lot of time after a girlfriend almost sucked the life out of him. It is a recharging period. Guys need it to remember they are single and loving life before wanting to settle down with the next one. Don’t take that personally, you should always take a break after someone.

Some guys do take a really long time to get over a girl. Ask yourself, why would you want to date him? If a guy is still a mess over an ex-girlfriend after more than a few months, he is probably not dating material at the moment anyway. He will just cry a lot, and think of her name, not yours, whenever Peter Frampton comes on the radio. 

Oooooo baby I love HER way, every day…

So why do guys abuse this? Well, there is just something so appealing about a guy who has just had his heart broken, isn’t there? He is fragile. He is vulnerable. He has a proven track record of commitment to a relationship and possibly would like one with you. This is almost as hot as the guy that is already taken. Of course, you want him! He has to be a good guy if he has a girlfriend, right? Common misconceptions. A guy knows he can use them to his advantage.

So in your head, you're thinking, he's not interested in jumping back into a relationship now, I can respect that. That just means I can prove to him I am nothing like his ex and he’ll want to date me! Why are you doing this to yourself? If you were that special to him, he would completely forget the ex because you’ve struck him like a lightning bolt. Wasting your time, in the waiting line, beware.

More to come...